“It’s our differences that make us better as a whole.”

— Alyson, Head Photographer at Jasper & Fern

After the heartache of finding myself surrounded by negative company too often in the past, I absolutely love and am grateful for now being surrounded by women who honestly want to see each other succeed. There are no ulterior motives, no people talking behind each others' backs - just women stepping in to share their knowledge and skill for the betterment of others.

Branding Portrait for marketing coach, Mallory Schlabach. | Winston-Salem On location Brand Photography | Jasper & Fern

One of my favorite parts about my job is the opportunity to build community and support another small businesses' success. It's about more than creating pretty pictures. It's learning your needs, getting to see where you're going and be involved in your vision. It's stepping into the world you're passionate about and connecting with your heart.

I've always said that each person has been created with unique gifts with which they can use to impact their community. It's our differences that make us better as a whole. It's our choice to use those gifts for the betterment of those around us.

"Confessions here…. the kind if you’re an entrepreneur or a business owner - the uncomfortable kind that you often second guess sharing. Well, I’m sharing anyway because I wanted to share the encouragement I found from the lesson I learned." | Winston-Salem Photographer | Quotes for the Female Entrepreneur | She is Not Me | Inspirational Quotes | Life Lessons for the working woman | Dealing with Comparison in the Workplace |

Entrepreneurial confessions here…. You know the kind if you’re an entrepreneur or a business owner - the uncomfortable kind that you often second guess sharing. Well, I’m sharing anyway because I wanted to share the encouragement I found from the lesson I learned.

You see, recently I found myself discouraged because another local photographer- who I just so happen to admire and support - started working with a brand I'd been aiming to work with. This realization was followed with some harsh criticisms for myself and then a significant mood drop - and zero celebration for the other photographer. I'm not proud to say it but, I was having a pity party for myself - and it's embarrassing to admit that I was struggling with being supportive.

After some course-correcting from a friend (who you surround yourself with is important!!) I started to think further outside of my initial microscopic perspective. Then, again, when another friend shared about a lost friendship and how we all make our own decisions and dream our own dreams, the puzzle pieces fell a little further into place.

SHE IS NOT ME.

This realization shifted my internal perspective and I found healing. Fundamentally, I know we are all different, I know we all are created uniquely, however, I often hear harsh whispers in my brain showing me I fell short. So when "she is not me" hit my heart and not just my head, there was peace.

And that's what I want to encourage you all with today. I hope each of you who struggle with the competitiveness of being an entrepreneur or aiming to keep your position or going for a promotion - THEY ARE NOT YOU. Yes, what you have to offer is phenomenal. What they have to offer is phenomenal also. Sometimes someone else will be a better fit and that narrows down your path just a little bit more to the people, the person, the brand, the better timing, the position that is the better fit for you. I want to remind you today, like I've been having to remind myself, SHE IS NOT ME.

My youtube channel makes some interesting suggestions sometimes. Most of the time it suggests diy projects, photography, Ellen, sharks and acrylic pours. It also occasionally suggests uplifting content. Most recently, one of the "What Would You Do" videos, headlined "Teen Wanting to Look Whiter," popped up. Heart strings tugged and interest in this social experiment drew me in.

In the video, two young black girls are discussing skin bleaching. The girls are actors attempting to instigate reactions from the surrounding people. Unfamiliar with these practices and unfamiliar with cultural standards, I really wasn't sure which direction these reactions would go.

The more responses that were shared, the larger the lump in my throat grew. This one gentleman compassionately responded how I wish anyone would respond to any person dealing with an insecurity or pressure like this.

"You don't think you're fine just the way you are?" After explaining his own experience with his aunts' skin bleaching and cautioning them about safety, he shared a beautiful perspective.

"See, there's different shades of beauty."

That sums it up right there. Beauty isn't just one thing or one type of person. Beauty is more than can be put on a box or a magazine cover and sold.

As a photographer, I see this struggle for self value and confidence in many of my clients. As a woman, as a human, I see these same struggles in myself. While my struggles were different than what the video is about, I wish I'd met someone with this compassion who could have shared with me what this man shared with these girls. No one should feel like they are “less than.”

This video, this story, goes to show how much we can impact each other - how much we influence each other's understanding of value and of beauty. Be kind with your words and actions, Friends.

As you go forward today, friend, know that you are perfect just the way you were created and, above all, know that you are loved.

(You can watch his whole interaction starting at 3:06 if you want. He does go on to share some other meaningful and compassionate insight.)

Social experiment focused on the standards of beauty when it comes to skin color | Skin bleaching | self value | beauty standards | self confidence | self hate | body issues | identity | young girls believing they’re worthless

Embody Love Movement was founded out of the inspiration from a group of a few young women who, together, found a passion for inspiring and empowering other girls and women to recognize their value and their potential. Their mission is to empower girls and women to celebrate their inner beauty, commit to kindness, and contribute to meaningful change in the world.

The Embody Love Catalysts are a group of young women who have radically embraced their bodies and, therefore, themselves.  In 2011, the catalysts were the initial recipients of a workshop that included media literacy education, yoga, and self-acceptance exercises.  Each of them felt a personal transformation, and together, they dreamed up ways to share the experience with other girls and women. In collaboration with Dr. Melody Moore, they developed Embody Love Movement’s founding programs: the Inner Beauty Shop and the Mentorship Program for younger girls struggling with eating disorders, self-esteem issues, and depression. Through giving back in service of others, the Catalysts have found a greater purpose in their journey to self-love and self-acceptance.  They have brought the Embody Love Movement to schools, camps, and organizations in Dallas and on their college campuses.

Jasper & Fern's founder, Alyson, knows these struggles all too well. She has fought with self-esteem issues her whole life, struggled with bulimia during most of her adolescence and still battles depression. When Kristen Williams, owner of K10 Yoga, approached Alyson about bringing the Embody Love Movement to North Carolina, it was kismet. Built on love, support, grace and compassion Jasper & Fern, K10 Yoga and Embody Love are the perfect fit.

Want to make an impact? You can!
Embody Love Facilitator Training is coming to Winston the end of September!!

“This workshop is going to be powerful. It’s not going to be something you can attend and simply absorb information. It’s going to move you. It’s going to grow your heart and it’s going to give you the skill set to make a deep impact on your loved ones and your community.”

— Alyson, owner of Jasper & Fern

Give the gift of self love to yourself and other women and girls in the community. Become a facilitator for the Embody Love Movement! Celebrate inner beauty, commit to kindness, contribute to meaningful change in the world.

Note: You do not have to be a yoga teacher to complete this training and share this work. Email Kristen Williams for details and to register! K10yogas@gmail.com

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